Oh that’s interesting. That’s my favorite movie of all time on the standard of porn-meets-plot. (If we’re talking about what movie had the hottest sex, I would give the edge to The Bigger the Better.) I am so fascinated by what happens between Bill and Brian that I lose awareness of cinematic details. I will rewatch that scene at some point with your critique in mind. I can visualize the problems that you’re pointing to now that you mention it. God, I love that movie.

Sidebar, pop up ads are ruining Disqus. Replying on my phone has become impossible for all but the shortest replies!

Oh no you di-int compare this to that amazing classic scene!!!!! I haven’t watched the CB scene so I shouldn’t put it down any further than I did in my previous comment, but Hayride defies description it’s so hot.

I was googling Bob Bishop recently. I can’t remember why. I think it was to comment on tan lines or something. Anyway, I found this picture, with not much detail but the site implies that Bob is alive and well and looks like this now. I honestly don’t know when a “where are they now” brought me more joy. I would give anything to meet him! He still looks so handsome, omg.

https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/08aa4fee40bd68aa4fd051123dc94141422267913fe94f7a33f20e36b7e34caa.jpg

A famous example of outdoor sex ruining a scene was the classic “A Sailor in the Wild”. Legendary bottom Bill Henson is wasted as shadows perpetually over his glorious hole. You can never get a clear view of him getting fucked.

1. Unfiltered sunlight. The perfect way to make even a young model look old.

https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6b9638583d4c566acb3d0b2bc7e4f1d43f3ea7bf9137984d64624e8b182690a7.jpg

2. The Timberland boots. My least favorite thing — no, second least — about 90s porn. We know what my least is, lol! The only way you have a naked man with boots on in a scene is to undress him and then redress him in those socks and boots, which just screams “I’m trying to look sexy.” Anything you have to put ON for sex is a turn-off (which is a hint for anyone still trying to figure out my least favorite thing about 90s porn).

3. Is this a corn field???

Lastly, expanding on #3, what Herb Ritts and Bruce Weber did so well that CB so often fails at is the marriage of setting and wardrobe. Fred With Tires works because even if the model doesn’t quite look like he belongs in a tire shop, everything else in the shot does belong including and especially what he was wearing. Ritts was supposed to be doing a fashion shoot, and he rejected the clothes that they were paying him to photograph because he understood that the viewer’s eye would never stop questioning the fantasy. If you’re going to shoot models in a corn field, dress them to look like they had a natural reason to be there. If they just look like rentmen in a corn field, then what is the point of putting them there?

https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d168653b1d5a56e53080c426b333aef5abd03e74736d26b747e374c3ad84b699.jpg

Fuck all yall if you think it’s weird!