Cedric at ChaosMen

A swing and a hit: that’s how ChaosMen’s Cedric steps up to the plate in our starting lineup. How a Parisian native ever got the knack for baseball we’ll never know, but clearly, living on the West Coast for a half-dozen years has given him the tools he needs for a big game. Hey, wait, most MLB players don’t really take their at-bats shirtless! It’s enough to make you actually watch an entire nine-inning game without skipping right to the locker room scene. This straight-with-girlfriend guy has killer brown eyes, a nice swing to his cut cock, and an ass that makes you understand why tan lines are the gay equivalent of painting a bullseye on your asscrack. Bryan Ockert says Cedric’s done video work where he shows off another MVP skill—bottoming. Now why couldn’t we convince the Mets’ Mike Piazza to try out for that team, too?

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